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Las Vegas, NV

When I was 13, Mum and Dad waited until dark before we drove from the darkness of the desert into the light city of Las Vegas. Fifteen years later, Dave and I took the same drive in. The city’s glow can be seen hundreds of kilometres out. There are 24,140 kilometres of neon tubing down the Las Vegas Strip and downtown. It was a long, bland freeway from Yosemite Camp Site to our plush hotel room in Las Vegas. 12 hours of nothing. It had been a few days since we had showered, brushed our hair or changed out of the clothes we had slept in. Basically, we looked as terrible as we felt. I think that the lovely hotel reception lady, at The Quad, felt sorry for us and gave us a huge deluxe room on the 17th floor overlooking The Strip for that reason.

I don’t suppose people come to Vegas for a good night’s sleep but we sure did on the first night. It felt like a week since we had slept in a bed, not in a car, couch or tent. The following morning, at about 8am, a husband said to his wife that he had just lost a few thousand on the gaming tables. The wife responded with something similar. I couldn’t believe that while we were sleeping, someone just ‘lost’ that amount of money. Welcome to Vegas Baby!

The first thing to know about Vegas is that it is the Disneyland for adults. Like Disneyland there are many components that make for a memorable experience. It’s not all about the gambling as some may presume. Vegas was visited by 32million tourists last year, a handful of our friends are included in those statistics. Those in the know will already be familiar with what Vegas has to offer. Like me, those who hadn’t experienced it guessed what it was like. Those with more than $3 to risk will have had a different experience to ours.
It’s not about the money here, although that helps. We managed to have a jam packed three days and two nights in Vegas, all the while doing it on a shoe string budget. Like Disneyland, there’s something for everyone.

If Bellagio was your first casino to visit in Vegas, you would be blown away by the size. It even has its own “conservatory” with beautiful floral displays. You may even say it’s the best hotel you have ever been in. Vegas boasts 17 of the 20 world’s largest hotels. The problem is, once you have visited these ‘resorts’, the expectations around casino/ hotels is that little bit higher. Opulence, grand, unique, themed and plush would be a few words to describe the ‘resorts’ along the Vegas strip, also known as Las Vegas Boulevard. Each one is the size of a small shopping centre, housing between 50 -150 designer boutiques. Each has upwards of 30 restaurants and bars and a gaming floor the size of a football field. Each is unique in its own way and can take hours to walk through.
The Bellagio wasn’t the first casino we visited, therefore we were a little underwhelmed by it’s mismatched theme and boring design compared to others. That’s not to say I’d pass up the opportunity to rest my head there, but Caesar Palace would be the ‘opulent hotel of choice’ and Dave’s favourite. What a snob, I know! The Roman Empire theme in Caesars is portrayed through marble floors, stone masonry pillars, reflecting pools and replicas of the Statue of David and many of the famous fountains from that era.
Hundreds of hotels line the strip. Due to our lack of time, we only went into the really big, well known ones. Many have themes but some are more obvious than others. The Venetian and Paris are the two standouts. Sadly, I think I liked these two resorts more than the ‘real’ cities, Venice and Paris. Maybe it was that I appreciated the effort and exceptional detail gone into the reproduction of these European cities. Outside the ‘Paris’ resort are half-scale replicas of the Eiffel Tower and Arc de Triomphe. The front of the hotel suggests the Paris Opera House and the Louvre. Inside the building façades surround the casino, modelling actual French neighbourhoods. Every restaurant or high end boutique has a different entrance way or roof. Above these shops are the hotel rooms yet they are made to look like French apartments. Many resorts have painted their ceilings blue with clouds giving an instant outside feeling, indoors. Paris goes one step further with their cobble stone streets and lamp posts. We continued to stroll past bubbling fountains and down the winding alleyways of Le Boulevard, filled with charming boutiques and restaurants that resemble Parisian cafes.
The main buffet in Paris has individual dining rooms. Each is themed for a particular french province and features an intricate facade designed to replicate the architecture of that region. We ate there twice with our buffet pass. The first time we ate there was under a tree on the cobble stones with street lights hung overhead. When we left that restaurant we were back on the Paris street where other restaurants, French patisseries and coffee shops have their own individual feel to them. They even have a token rude Parisian, unintentionally of course, but it wouldn’t of been the same with out it. Although Paris and Venice were my least favourite cities, these two hotels were my favourite in Vegas. They have nailed the details so accurately. The Venetian for example, has a fully functioning canal. Venice’s Grand Canal, winds its way through cobbled walkways and streetside cafes. Gondoliers actually float beneath bridges, under balconies and through the vibrant Venetian streetscape. Unlike the real Venice, the Las Vegas Italian’s sing…. “when the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, That’s amore”.
In third place, was New York New York. The only reason they get a look in is because of their yellow cab outdoor roller coaster. We throughly enjoyed zipping around outside of New York after a few daiquiris.
The Mirage and Treasure Island have a rain forest and pirate ship. The Exalibar looks like Disneyland and the Luxor or ‘the pyramid’ has an Egyptian theme with sphinx and marble mummies. The Luxor has a high powered light shinning from the tip of their pyramid shaped hotel. Their electricity bill is $60 per hour, but can be seen from space. Aria and The Cosmopolitan are glamorous. What struck us with the Cosmopolitan is all the pretty ladies in their knickers dancing in little boxes. Not just for the men at the bar, but they seemed to be imbedded in the walls for the passers by. I guess you could say I wrote a lot about these resorts, but the reality is that is a huge part of Vegas. Regardless of which hotel you wander into, the casino takes centre stage. Often a walk between the gaming tables is required to get to the shopping centre or hotel reception. Unlike Australia, there are no dress regulations. From flip flops or shorts is acceptable. I guess in their opinion, it doesn’t matter what you wear as long as you have money to spend – it’s good enough for Vegas!

“Vegas Fact #8: The 34 million people who go to Vegas to gamble collectively lose about $6 billion per year between them or about $175 per trip to Vegas. Another way to look at it Is each gambler kindly donates $580 to an already $8 billion profitable business. Funnily enough, the average expense for sightseeing was only $9.63. Sadly, but believably, Vegas has the highest suicide rate in the country for both residents and tourists.”

Thankfully Vegas caters for those who don’t want to risk anything. Every corner you walk around, someone is there giving paper money to spend in their casinos. Over the three days we were given $150 of casino money to spend in Casino Royale, Caesars Palace, MGM and Luxor. The thrill and odds were the same as if we had forked $150 out of our own pockets but without the risks. Unlike that husband and wife in the lift who lost thousands, we only lost $3 of our own money and won$19.17. We don’t have the patience for gambling, so a few hours on the slot machines and tables was plenty of time for us to have a go at gambling in Vegas. The best thing about spending somebody else’s money, was the free drinks they gave us for doing so. In Vegas, the waitresses dressed in skimpy outfits give out free drinks t
o anyone playing the machines. How can you not love this place? They give you money to spend in their casinos and then reward you with free drinks!
It’s not just casino credits that can be won. We won a two night Caribbean cruise by registering for some promotion in Treasure Island casino. We missed out on the car and $2 million dollars, but beggars can’t be choosers. Another day, we chatted to a lady who gave us tickets to The Vegas Show, dinner and vouchers if we spent two hours listening to her talk about a timeshare presentation. We desperately wanted to go to a Vegas show but didn’t want to spend hundreds doing so. Similar to gambling, we wanted to experience something but without putting our hands into our own pockets. In Vegas, this is possible. If we sound like cheap **** snobs, that’s because we are!

“Vegas Fact #59: The average number of daily weddings is 315. The wedding license and marriages cost is $255. As there are no required blood tests or waiting periods, and couples may utilise the additional service, a divorce, for only$450. The odds of that marriage succeeding is about the same as a day on the pokies”

Las Vegas isn’t just about the gambling and free drinks; it’s also about food, glorious food … more specifically, the buffets. I didn’t realise they are famous for this.
The Bellagio buffet has a reputation for being one of Vegas’ best. Sadly the $50pp price tag was unaffordable for one meal. Once again, Vegas provided options for those not willing to break the bank. As an alternative, we purchased a $45 buffet pass. It gave us the option to eat at 7 buffets within 24 hours. If timed right, that’s 2 dinners, a breakfast and lunch for less than it would have been to go for one meal at the Bellagio. The buffets we went to for those four meals were the best buffets we had ever been to in our lives. The Paris buffet gave us complimentary wine and Planet Hollywood’s Spices buffet was so extensive it even had candy floss!

There are as many drink options in Vegas as there are food and gambling options. To name a few, the $50 open bars, $2Tequila Bars, $22 oxygen massage bars, $5 Margarita bars but our favourites were the Daiquiri bars. It’s a genius concept. After choosing a vessel to contain the daiquiri, mix and match the flavours to suit your taste buds. Refills can be made on nearly every corner. They seem to be more common than a coffee shop. The best bit about Vegas is, the ability to walk around the streets, shopping centres, casinos and some restaurants with an American football filled with tequila mix and walk out with sweet rum punch. You have to remember there is so much going on everywhere you look, with a drink in your hand you are flexible to experience so much for free. We saw the Duelling Pianos, funky jazz bands and other awesome live bands this way. When we got bored we took our drink and wandered down the strip to the next spot. There is always music playing and something happening at night. The Bellagio fountains put on their world famous show every 15 minutes. Bursts of water shoot stories high and lighting timed to music all beautifully choreographed made for the best water show we had ever seen.

I googled 5 words to describe Vegas. So many answers from every side of the spectrum came up. Gourmet food, world’s premier casinos or spectacular shows. That’s what I love about a place like this. Whether a high roller or a low-key lounger, Las Vegas has something for everyone. We stayed in the cheapest place on the strip yet it was the best hotel we had ever stayed in and for cheaper than a campsite. We ate like kings and drank like soldiers. We didn’t win the million but we don’t lose the earth. There’s not any one component of Vegas that makes this place pop but all of them collectively make Disneyland for adults like no place on earth. These are the 5 words we would use to describe Vegas: varied, glamorous, atmospheric, desired and epic.

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